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As it turns out life is complicated and messy and gritty and dirty. Call it simple or easy if you want, but you're lying to yourself to feel better. It's hard growing up in today's world, it's hard having friends who betray you or families that are hard to like. We all need those everlasting friends and those moments of clarity where we see our lives flash before us, and those times to be completely carefree. As we crash through the jungle of this life, we all steal a few hearts and break a few bones. But hey. That's life right?

Friday, June 11, 2010

Pirates Aren't Cool in Elementary School

I've been working at an elementary school in Seattle with the Children's Literacy Project (CLP), which sends tutors to schools to work with kids. I'm a tutor, and I'll be posting excerpts from my CLP journal.
 
Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Back to working with word sort. Today there were about three different kids at once all working on different word sorts. Actually Nick continued to tell me he was sorting words, when all the while he was plainly cutting up paper squares into smaller squares. He eventually got around to sorting, but then kept sticking his nose into Chrystal’s word sort, which Chrystal was none too happy about. She would say a word before explaining it to me, and Nick would start telling me what it meant before she could get a word in edgewise.
Two of the words that stuck out today were “bandit” and “pirate”. Chrystal didn’t know what either word meant, so I told her a bandit was a robber, and a pirate was a robber who did his robbing at sea. I said bandits would hold up carriages and banks in the Wild West, and pirates would do the same thing with ships on the ocean. Nick butted in that Blackbeard was a pirate and started to tell a story about him, but Chrystal looked so furious I told him not to. After I’d explained what a pirate was, Chrystal did not look happy.
“I’m scared,” She said quietly, and that made me feel pretty bad. I hadn’t said anything scary or terrible about pirates, except that they were robbers, but maybe that was enough. I grew up reading stories of a romanticized Wild West and hero bandits who would hold up rich carriages, and stories of Robin Hood of Sherwood Forest, but I then didn't grow up in the city where muggings were a daily occurrence. Needless to say, we moved on.

2nd Graders and Mr. Incredible

I've been working at an elementary school in Seattle with the Children's Literacy Project (CLP), which sends tutors to schools to work with kids. I'm a tutor, and I'll be posting excerpts from my CLP journal.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010
    
I continued working with the kids on their Word Sorts today, and although most of the day was mundane, there were a few amusing instances worth recounting. The kids cycle through sorting their words pretty quickly, but one boy stayed with me sorting words for quite some time. His name is Nick, and if you imagine a miniature version of Mr. Incredible minus the costume from the Disney Pixar animated film, you’ll have a pretty good idea of what Nick looks like. He’s taller than half the kids in class, and has a heavy build and rudy cheeks. His brow is often furrowed in concentration, when other kids are ignoring their work, and he dutifully follows all of Ms. Visala’s instructions.

Nick sorted the words quickly enough, and then began to read each word to me and grant me a long, drawn-out explanation of what each word meant. In between words he told me little tidbits about his life- he used to live in Texas, he loves watching the old Scooby Doo cartoons with his dad. His stories were amusing, and his astonishment that I had never seen the cartoon where Scooby Doo meets Batman was a laugh-out-loud occasion. He told jokes, and spoke in such a grown-up manner that just about everything he said was funny. If you put him in a suit you could pass him off as a little person and no one would know the difference.
Two of the words today were “dead” and “death”, and I was interested to hear his explanations of them. He passed over “dead” pretty quickly, but when we hit “death” he rubbed his chin like he had a beard to rub for a few seconds. Then he looked straight into my eyes and said, “Well who do you think puts you up there?” He pointed at the ceiling. “Or down there?” He pointed at the floor.
I wasn’t sure what he meant, so I asked him just that, and repeated what he’d said, still pointing, and looked at me expectantly. “Well who do you think?” He asked again? It dawned on me that he was talking about Death, as in the Grim Reaper.
“You mean the Grim Reaper?” I asked.
“I don’t know, but he always wears a long coat, and he either puts you up there (points up) or down there (points down).”
He seemed so serious, but the matter-of-fact way he said “Well who do you think” just cracked me up. He smiled too.
“I try to be funny,” he said, “for the adults.” He was completely serious. “We kids have too much fun, you know, but you adults don’t. You know, it’s-“ and he mimed stacking papers and looking serious. “That’s it.”
This kid was just too much. I tried to contain my laughter, and thanked him for being so funny, because it certainly was working, and I certainly was having fun.

Monday, June 07, 2010

The Beautiful Things that Heaven Bears

America. It is a land of opportunity, a country where streets are paved with gold. Those with the highest aspirations know they can only be reached here in this place. It is the kind of place where dreams come true, and money grows on trees, and all live together pursuing freedom, and truth, and justice. It is the Promised Land purported to be flowing with the milk of hope and the honey of dreams. But for immigrants the milk and honey may have a bitterness natives don’t understand.

Author Dinaw Mengestu describes the isolation of immigrants exquisitely in his book, The Beautiful Things That Heaven Bears. Three lines of poetry from Dante’s Inferno represent the whole of the book in their poignancy,

“Through a round aperture I saw appear,
Some of the beautiful things that Heaven bears,
Where we came forth, and once more saw the stars.”

Mengestu’s book has five main characters, three of whom are foreign immigrants. Sepha is from Nigeria, his friend Joseph from the Democratic Republic of Congo, and Kenneth is from Kenya. Judith, a white woman, and her biracial daughter, Naomi, are wealthy newcomers to a predominantly poor area of town, immigrants of a different kind. The lines from Inferno summarize the four isolating types of hell Sepha, Joseph, Kenneth, and Judith experience as immigrants, and the agony that’s all too common among foreign immigrants to the United States.

Joseph represents the understandable reluctance of immigrants to assimilate to a new culture. Mengestu describes Joseph as someone who cannot let go of Africa. He is a man who walks forward, but with his back to the future, forever walking backward, so that he can watch his home country disappearing. In one scene Joseph comments on the lines from the Inferno above saying, “… No one can understand that line like an African because that is what we lived through. Hell every day with only glimpses of heaven in between (Mengestu, 2007, 100).” He, like many immigrants, still longs for his homeland with an undiminished love that spans time and distance. “There was hardly a single thing in Joseph’s life…that hadn’t become a metaphor for Africa. From great lines of poetry to the angle of falling light on a spring afternoon, he saw flashes of the continent wherever he went (Mengestu, 2007, 100).” The pursuit of “flashes of the continent” manifests itself in the formation of ethnic ghettos, which provide a community for immigrants, but also perpetuate their segregation from the rest of society.The hell that Joseph and the immigrants living in ghettos are experiencing is the Hell of Homelessness. Although these immigrants have come to a new country to enjoy its benefits, it is not their home, and their true home is the unreachable star in the heavens, untouchable, except by its cheap imitation in ghettos, the Africa metaphors Joseph sees everywhere.

Kenneth is another type of immigrant. He represents an immigrant caught between two worlds who reaches unceasingly for the carrot of a new country dangling in front of his nose. While Joseph misses Africa and sees its image in everything, “Kenneth hates him for this (Mengestu, 2007, 100).” Kenneth is hyper-conscious of his status as a foreign immigrant. Like Fanon, he sees how he is being seen by the natives, and he hates it. He always appears respectable by wearing a pressed shirt and an impeccably tied tie. “He believes in the power of a well-tailored suit to command the attention and respect of those who might not otherwise give him a second thought (Mengestu, 2).” His teeth, which are neither straight, nor white, stay hidden behind his hand when he talks to natives; he is self-conscious about who he is, and yet he gives a big grin to his friends when they ask him about his teeth, saying “’You can never forget where you came from if you have teeth as ugly as these’ (Mengestu, 3,” in self-deprecation.

He lives in imitation of the wealthy, successful men he wants to be, repeating the same phrases over and over because that’s what successful Americans do, and hanging up the phone abruptly because the powerful “can dismiss with a wave of the hand and never think twice about it (Mengestu, 2007, 35).” Yet, despite all of his charades he is no closer to being a successful, wealthy American, and he is trapped his hell. He hates seeing how he is seen, and tries to make himself someone different in response, but can’t, and must continuing the cycle of loathing. He hates his hell, sees the stars outside, and cannot help but wish he were out there, and cannot help but hate the place he must remain.

Perhaps the strangest of Mengestu’s characters is not alcoholic Joseph, or Ken the engineer, but the mysterious Judith. She is a white woman, a single mother of a biracial daughter, a former professor of American political history, and she’s moved into a new neighborhood that’s so unfamiliar it’s practically a foreign country. Judith is the unwelcome immigrant, the foreigner who wants nothing more than to live her life, but finds herself the object of the neighborhood’s animosity toward strangers, the butt of nativism’s humorless joke.

Mengestu has turned nativism on its head in his portrayal of Judith as its victim. Normally when we picture over-zealous patriots uniting against foreigners, we see white Arizonans turning on the immigrants of color from Mexico, or the citizens of Boston or New York confining immigrants from all over the world to ghettos in the 1900s, but here the natives are poor, predominantly Black, and they turn on a wealthy white newcomer. The irony is striking.

When Judith first moves in Mrs. Davis, a native, sums up the neighborhood attitude towards her. “’Why do you think a woman like that would wanna live here? Doesn’t seem right, does it?’ (Mengestu, 2007, 23)” Judith is the character who represents the immigrants who come to the United States and find discrimination in the place of the welcome they expected. A 2008 article in Ebony describes the hatred Somali immigrants are facing in Columbus, Ohio. The city is home to the nation’s second-largest population of Somalis, 45,000, but nativism is a tragic problem that has fueled shootings, deaths, vandalism, and prejudice. In an irony that almost matches that of Mengestu, the native Black community is often at odds with African newcomers. A mosque where nearly 1,500 Somalis worship has been repeatedly vandalized, and the words “Go back to Africa” have been spray-painted on it. The congregation was even the target of a paintball gun attack. This type of degrading discrimination is seen all over the United States and is symptomatic of the Hell of Discrimination experienced by many new immigrants.

At last we come to the last of Mengestu’s representations of immigrants, the last of the characters he places in a hell, Sepha. He is the immigrant who hates himself, who can’t let go of Africa, but Sepha does not have the same hatred as Kenneth, or the same nostalgia as Joseph. His enemy is not the way others see him; his enemy is not the unfamiliarity of the New World. No, Sepha’s enemy is his own mind, and the trauma that tortures him. Sepha has isolated himself in a hell because his silent betrayal caused his father’s death, and neither he, nor his father, can forgive him now. Like Judas, who killed himself after he betrayed his Lord, Sepha considers his sin to be so great that he cannot allow himself to move on.

Sepha is less of a true immigrant, and more of an exile, pushed out of his home by his mother, plagued with survivor’s guilt. Although Sepha talks about going home throughout the novel, he can’t bring himself to actually do it, because he can’t go home, because he must remain in exile in penance of the sins he believes he has committed. This character represents a small community of immigrants whose very existence is painful to them. They feel that they could have done something to avert the catastrophe that caused them to flee their home country, or that the event was their fault. These survivors reside in a hell of their own making, constantly reminding themselves of the trauma they experienced. Sepha is fairly disinterested with his life in the present because to him his past makes a future to look forward to unattainable.

Sepha is so traumatized, is so entrenched in his hell, that he cannot have ambitions, cannot wish anything good for himself. He quits his job, runs away from his problems, but most of his major decisions haven’t actually been his own. His mother pushes him to leave Africa, his uncle drags him to a job interview and does all the talking, even his store is Kenneth’s idea. He sees the beautiful things heaven bears in a possible relationship with Judith, and when talking about expanding the store, but he never reaches for them because he knows he just doesn’t deserve them. This Hell of Guilt is the hell where inhabitants see the stars and do not weep to know they will never be theirs, but accept passively that they are unworthy even of the light of the stars.

Each of these characters is living in a hell. Joseph because he is homeless, constantly looking backward, Kenneth because he hates being seen as a foreigner, Judith because she is unwelcome, and Sepha because he is guilt-ridden. These four represent four types of immigrants in the United States, the ghetto inhabitant, the stereotyped, the persecuted, and the survivors. Every one of them, even the survivor, is isolated in his new “home”. We think of America as this utopia, this paradise of freedom, and truth, and justice, but we can be as unwelcoming as a nightmare of a mother-in-law, as misunderstanding as a deaf man, and as discriminatory as a slave owner. Today we rarely turn our heads to discuss the plight of immigrants in the US today, unless we’re complaining about the rising numbers of illegal immigrants. The legal immigrants are too often overlooked. But as illegal immigration increases nativist sentiments, and these issues go un-discussed and swept under the rug, we are isolating those whom years ago founded the idea of American freedom- immigrants. Too many immigrants come to America out of a hell, because they see the beautiful things our heaven bears, and too often they are instead isolated in a new hell where they can see the stars but never touch them.

The New Missionary Movement of Today

Dear Dr. Táíwò,

I am writing to you about your book, How Colonialism Preempted Modernity in Africa. It was a challenging read. I found it to be dense, packed with all the details I wanted to know; it was thorough, every facet of your subject was covered; it was fair, you presented both sides of an topic and clearly demonstrated with level-headed argument your point. As ripe with controversial issues as your book is, I would like to discuss with you what I found to be the most personally challenging aspect of your book, and I’d like to open with an anecdote.

The year is 1999. I’m nine years old. I have been on my feet for most of the day and I’m sweating through my cotton dress; the small cinderblock church keeps most of the heat at bay so the afternoon sun isn’t too oppressive. I’m watching a young girl about my age named Julita have her hand wrapped in bandages by a nurse. She had made to flip the light switch on in her home, and a current of electricity had shot through her, burning her fingers. There was nothing her family could do for her injury, so she had gone on with her day. It was now a few weeks later and one of the nurses had spotted her playing with the other children and, horrified, told her to fetch her parents and come back to the clinic. I watch as the tiny, yellowed bones that protrude from her fingertips where she’d touched the switch disappear under gauze. Gangrene gnaws at her hand and she has no idea. It will kill her if left untreated. An untreated electrocution wound infected with gangrene is unheard of in the United States. But Julita lives in the Dominican Republic, and my family was there with the Christian and Missionary Alliance to run temporary medical clinics in slums and rural areas.

In your book you discuss the role of missionaries in the spread of the philosophy of colonialism in Africa. You separate these missionaries into two groups: those who participate in the autonomy model, and those who support the aid model. This is the topic I found myself wrestling with. As a missionary myself, your words not only put me immediately on the defensive, but I began to question if I had done more harm than good on my missionary ventures. In 2008 my dad and I took a trip with the Christian Medical Society to Nicaragua to administer medical aid to a poor area. While my year in the Dominican Republic was formative – it hugely shaped my character, my outlook on the world, and my hopes and dreams – the Nicaragua trip was a result of this formation. I have an urgent desire to help those in need, but I have never deeply considered the concept of agency or the themes in your book when dreaming about a future as a missionary doctor. I don’t think as a nine-year-old I had any concept of treating Dominicans as any less than human. Humans were humans to me at that age, color didn’t matter. But today I found myself faced with the image of Schweitzer from Le Gran Blanc and, though I dreaded it, I had to ask myself if I was looking at a reflection of myself, or if I was only imagining I saw myself in him.

After all, Schweitzer ran a medical hospital in a rural area of Africa that had no other access to healthcare. He spent his life in service treating many people who probably would have died without his attention. Since the Dominican Republic I have been chasing a dream to become a medical doctor in order to serve those who need it most. I have often thought about moving to the third world full-time after becoming a doctor. The film on Schweitzer, the subsequent discussions of it, then your book, reminded me that it’s easy for missionaries today to export more than just their faith. They might also transmit sociocryonics, be guilty of Schweitzer’s paternalism, or adhere unconsciously to the aid model, all whilst ministering to their flock with the best of intentions. If I join a missionary organization will I just be a pawn in a larger movement to discount, discourage, and destroy native agency?

You thoroughly explore the consequences of the missionary aid model in your book, so I don’t feel it’s necessary to repeat your arguments as my own, but I would like to examine the state of missions in the world today to determine whether or not the aid model still dominates the mission field. Although “…the aid model has so inured itself in the African imagination that even so-called progressives cannot wean themselves from it (Taiwo, 2010),” I believe the age of aid missionaries is coming to an end as missions that follow the autonomy model become more prevalent. Today, the most ambitious projects, the missions and aid organizations that are truly changing the world, are the ones that encourage native agency. I argue that a third wave of missionaries is sweeping the globe in a new movement that is empowering native missionaries, and spreading a renewed philosophy that’s cracking the tough exterior of sociocryonics left and right.

Recently the numbers of native missionaries have been climbing. Europeans and Americans once had the market cornered on sending missionaries from a home country to a foreign one, but no longer. Forty years ago the some 3,500 cross-cultural native missionaries were a small group compared to the massive export of missionaries by the United States, but that number has shot up to an estimated 103,000 native missionaries today (Moll, 2006).This means that Christian converts are not only leading their own churches, but are sending members of their own congregations to plant churches and inspire other native missionaries in foreign countries; the students are becoming leaders to teach other students to lead. There may be no better example of a missionary autonomy model than this recent explosion of native missions.

Native missions have been particularly strong in recent years. In fact, “South Korea alone sends out as many new missionaries each year as all of the countries of the West combined (Moll, 2006).” This Korean movement that’s now disseminating native agency philosophy worldwide is exceptional. In 1980 the church there had 80 missionaries in other countries; ten years later there were 1,200 missionaries abroad, and today nearly 13,000 missionaries from South Korea are serving in other countries (Moll, 2006). These South Korean missionaries are running their own churches, and deploying missionaries to teach other native Christians to do the same. The autonomy model is alive and well in South Korea, and they’re spreading it around the world.

Advancing Native Missions (ANM) is an organization that partners with native missionaries. Its mission statement proposes that natives are in a unique position to minister because they already know the culture, the language, the geography, the political scene, etc. This particular example of the autonomy model is extraordinary in that it elevates native missions above Western missions. It doesn’t discount or discredit Western missions, but ANM recognizes that an Indian reaching out to India, and Iranians reaching out to Iran can be more effective than a white missionary in an area foreign to him. According to ANM 80% of world evangelization today is now done by native missionaries, a flabbergasting statistic (ANM, 2002). In your book you mention that around the turn of the twentieth century African native agency was being overthrown by missionaries and administrators who had “convinced themselves that Africans could not be trusted to run their own affairs (Taiwo, 2010),” and while I agree that this second wave of missionaries helped rob Africans of their subjectivity, I also think that it was soon supplanted by a third wave that was interested in restoring agency.

In 1953, a missionary doctor named Helen Roseveare traveled to Congo to spread the gospel and administer medical care to the area. She was a single white woman, a graduate of Cambridge, and she was a rare gem, who fought for an autonomy model, despite the opposition of other missionaries in Congo. She began to build a hospital by hand, making and firing the bricks herself to construct the buildings, and “within eleven years, a 14-acre plot of land had been turned into a 100 bed hospital and maternity complex with all the necessary buildings and services (Voelkel, 2010).” Roseveare didn’t run an entire hospital on her own; she trained natives as medical assistants and midwives, and they established 48 clinics in the area (Voelkel, 2010). When civil war broke out in 1964, rebel forces took her captive, destroyed her hospital, and beat and raped her. She was released and she went home to England, but returned a year later to build an even larger hospital and medical school for the newly independent country. No missionary is perfect, but Roseveare’s commitment to the autonomy model is noteworthy, especially as she was serving in a field primarily dominated by men who adhered to the aid model, and her work inspired many others to do the same.

Today perhaps the greatest example of the autonomy model in modern medical care is Paul Farmer’s Partners in Health (PIH). While PIH is not a Christian organization, it eviscerates the aid model while building on the autonomy model. Farmer has a love for Haiti, and that’s where he chose to start PIH. Angered by the quality of care usually afforded to the sick by “aid” organizations, Farmer set a new standard. He not only focused on treating disease, he tackled disease prevention with education programs and community partnerships. PIH declares that “by whatever means necessary” any person who comes to a PIH clinic will receive the best care available at the facility (PIH, 2010). Indeed, “by whatever means necessary” includes Farmer stealing a microscope from Harvard to stock his Haitian hospital’s lab (Kidder, 2003). Farmer’s concept of treating the poor with the best medical care available was not just unheard of, it turned out to be revolutionary. The World Health Organization was put to shame when tiny PIH proved drug-resistant tuberculosis could be cured affordably and effectively in poor and rural areas. PIH has shown the world that the lives of everyone, no matter how poor, are of equal worth and should be treated accordingly.

Today I stand on the brink of graduating from my first year of college, and my life choices seem immensely pivotal. My dream of being a doctor, and possibly a missionary doctor, remain intact not despite, but because of, your book. The world needs more Paul Farmers, it needs more native missionaries, it needs the philosophy of native subjectivity to spread like wildfire, and I intend to drop matches everywhere possible in hopes the forest of hate, and prejudice, and stolen agency will go up in an orange blaze and be swept away. Thank you for writing a call to action.

Sincerely,

Katy Granath

Letters to the Battlefield

I hear your voice over the telephone, 
and you won't say what's goin' on
You sound so sad, I wanna hold you tight, 
and tell you everything is gonna be alright
And I believe...that you'll come back to me
Oh I believe...that someday we will see
that we are where we're s'posed to be,
 and you'll be standing next to me

So when there's fire and they're dropping bombs
the world's exploding and everything is wrong
When there's so much pain that you can't talk
and you're so afraid the night's too long
When you's so tired you can't be strong
and you need someone to be your rock
and you wanna hold a hand to help you walk
close your eyes and play this song

I hear your voice over the telephone, 
and you won't say what's goin' on.
You sound so sad I wanna hold you tight, 
and tell you everything is gonna be alright
And I believe...that you'll come back to me
oh I believe...that someday we will see
that we are where we're s'posed to be, 
and you'll be standing next to me

If there's so much noise that you can't hear
or you think the end is drawing near
If you can't move there's too much fear
or you don't want anyone to see your tears
If the blood becomes too much to bear
or you wake up in the night with the nightmares
When you're holding onto nothing but a broken prayer
Listen to my voice and I'll protect you there

I hear your voice over the telephone
and you won't say what's goin' on
You sound so sad, I wanna hold you tight
and tell you everything is gonna be alright
'Cause I believe...that you'll come back to me
Oh I believe...that someday we will see
That we were where we're s'posed to be
and you'll be standing next to me

If you think the wrath of God is pouring down
and you're so lost you can't be found
When the  screaming is so effing loud
It's in your head, you can't keep it out
if your heart is silent and it cannot pound
If you're sinking in the sand and you're gonna drown
I want you to put your gun down
and focus on me, and on this sound

I hear your voice over the telephone
and you won't say what's goin' on
You sound so sad, I wanna hold you tight
and tell you everything is gonna be alright
And I believe...that you'll come back to me
Oh I believe...that someday we will see
That we were where we're s'posed to be
And you'll be standing next to me

Looking at me now with a great big grin
As the rain beats down to wash away our sins
The clouds will break and the sun will shine
So you tell them that you can't lie
'cause you promised me you'd come home fine


I hear your voice over the telephone
and you won't say what's goin' on
You sound so sad, I wanna hold you tight
and tell you everything is gonna be alright
And I believe...that you'll come back to me
Oh I believe...that someday we will see
That we were where we're s'posed to be
And you'll be standing next to me