Forever is a Long, Long Time

And I haven't written in forever. But here I am, writing again. When life gets busy and full, it's hard to try to justify putting my thoughts into cyberspace. Anyway, I just got back from CAMA Camp and it was amazing as usual. But Camp this year was more than "usual". I met a lot of new people and I'm beginning to realize that even though I only see these people once a year at this camp, I think they're going to be my life-long friends. I mean, I think it's these people who are going to be the ones I can turn to in times of trouble.

So Camp is physically exhausting, you know, but more than that, it's like standing under the Niagra Falls of God and Jesus and faith and Christianity and spiritual warfare and worship and yeah. It's an incredible sensation to be totally immersed in God and in the Word for an entire week. And I feel my faith being built and I feel God tugging on my heart and I can hear His voice again and what a joy that is. To have gone so long without thinking about what God wanted for me- that was just wrong. But I'm back on the path now. I'm picking my way along the straight and narrow and I'm setting out, I'm resolving, I'm vowing to use this next year to become more like the woman God wants me to be. I'm going to be growing a lot this year. I think God is really going to be stretching me and I'm going to try to really read my Bible everyday and dig in to the Word and I'm going to relinquish control. I don't know if you know how hard that will be for me, so let me explain. I'm a little OCD, I guess, and I'm a very controlling person. I like to have control of my life. I need to have control of my life, but I can't do it anymore, it's just too much weight, too much for me to carry on my own, so God is gonna have to help me from now on, because I have to give it up. There's this Hillsong song that the speaker at camp played one night and it goes "Bring me to my knees, Lord I lay me down, rid me of myself, I belong to you" And that's so true for me.

Here's a shout-out to John and Keshia, Dan and Mel, Damaris and Hannah, Connor and Lace. Love you guys.